I do not tolerate tardiness

I do not tolerate tardiness

I do not tolerate tardiness,” a professor tells his class at the beginning on the semester.

Looking out at the sea of stricken faces in the large lecture hall he continues. “There are 300 of you, and only one of me. I will not allow you to waste my time.

If you are late to class, I will count you as absent for the day. If you hand in an assignment late, it will not count towards your grade.

If you are even one minute late for a test, do not bother handing it in, I will not grade it.”

Throughout the semester he makes good on his promise, throwing out late papers and marking late students absent. At the end of the semester, the day before the final, he reminds the students to be on time or their tests will not be graded.

The next day all of the students arrive on time for the test, except for one.

Twenty minutes into the test this last student casually walks into the class, goes to the front of the room, and picks up a test.

He takes it to a desk and proceeds to fill in the answers.

The professor watches, first in annoyance, and then with an air of smug satisfaction at the life lesson he’s about to deliver.

“Just wait until he tries to turn it in and finds I won’t grade it!”

The test period winds down and students start to hand in their tests. All the students, that is, except for the late student. As the pile of papers grows, so does the professor’s anger. The late student continues to fill in his answers all the way to the end of the period, even going ten minutes over. Finally, he gets up to hand in his paper.

By this time, the professor is absolutely fuming. “How dare you!” He rants at the student. “Coming in late, staying after the bell has rung! Just who do you think you are?!”

The student gives the professor a scathing look. “Don’t you *know who I am?”

“No,” the professor scoffs, “I certainly do not!”

“Oh thank goodness!” says the student, relieved. He shoves his test into the middle of the stack of exams and runs out of the room.